Time to Transition into a Full Online Economy

So everyone is at home. So people cant go  to the office. Should they really be going to the office anyway? My wife is in meetings all day long with multiple people. The meetings are long and productive. She never leaves the home. I obviously have always worked at home. That's what writers do. But this paradyme of people driving into big cities to go to their offices is so twentieth century. We have been toying with a virtual business world for a long time. Now with the coronovirus it is time to go into a full online economy that is impervious to work stoppage.

Publishers have shut down. My publisher has shut down. Why? Everyone in publishing works on computers creating books. This can be done anywhere. In fact my last editor did all his work from home. So why did publishing shut down? The people who write the checks and run the company couldn't come into the office so it was all just shut down. Ridiculous. Everyone should be working from home. The office concept is slowly dying anyway and cornovirus might be the final death knell of driving to a central location to do what you can do at home.

But more than all that we now buy things online We get our groceries delivered. We work remotely all the time. We can have meetings remotely. Write checks remotely. Get hired and fired remotely. There is no reason to be in any central location where we are in danger of becoming infected. The cornovirus is an organism that cannot infect wires and silicon chips. We are twenty first century people so lets act that way and leave this virus behind with an economy that never stops. 

Bats Don't Party

Oh I wont get it. Good to be on the beach. What up with all those old people hiding in their homes? Hope I die before I get old. Pass the suntan lotion. Yeah baby. Beers. Pina Colodas. Good to be in the sun of Florida. Here let me rub that on you. Shotgun the beer. Good to be out of the parents basement! Coronowhat? Not like I'm going to get it. I'll just wipe out my parents and grandparents and that old man who hangs out in the park. But you know what, it's good to be king!

Oh wow. 40 percent. Forty percent of the people in hospitals are age 20 to 54. Huh. What up with that? All that youth doesn't stand a chance against a virus from a bat in China. Bats don't party. Bats like darkness in caves where strange viruses mutate. Still why should I not enjoy spring break? You know people act likes its Pearl Harbor or some shit. I heard after Pearl Harbor things got so bad the government quit telling people the news. Hey it's not like we are in a war or anything.

Still whats with the bars closing and the restaurants? Where are all the people? I mean we are on the beach but everyone else is like MIA. Yeah well. You know what. Its sunny. The ocean is blue. Life is good...Right? Yo...shoot me a beer. 

Giving Speeches During the 2020 Pandemic

No handshaking. Easier than it sounds. Keep your hands clasped behind your back. Sometimes people still come on and there is the hand. Sorry. I cant. Oh. The hand retracts. Spray down the podium. The microphone. You never know. Keep your distance as you work the crowd. Go and wash your hands several times before you go on. Then you are behind your podium. Your barrier. From here on it is a cakewalk as the audience is in the dark and you are up by the screen.

Some questions. And then the lights come up. Some people want to talk. Keep your hands clasped behind your back. You take a few steps back and most people respect the distance. But then comes the woman who has to tell you about her family history. And she does not know the meaning of personal space. She comes on. Did I tell you about my family? No. You take a few steps back and she takes a few forward. So they came over in 1665... Uh huh. She comes closer. You take another step back.

Now you are backed into the wall and still she comes on. So I researched and what I found....Now she has you. You have no where to go as your back hits the wall. You are within the three feet the CDC says to avoid. She is coming in for the kill. You pivot and take refuge behind the book table. It has become your moat. Well thank you for coming you say, grabbing your hand sanitizer. It doesn't matter. If she has the virus you probably have it by now.