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Monday, March 11, 2013

What is it about male friendship?

NY Times magazine article on male friendship. Interesting. The basic thesis is that men provide for other men something that women cannot. What they provide is anybodies guess but the article took a shot and so will I. Men who have lots of male friends recognize that these friendships round them out in a way their wives or girlfriends cannot. I know that for me it is simply being able to say whatever I want and have it instantly accepted. No frown. No...now why would you say that? Lets face it there is a censoring that goes on between couples and say what you will, you can never say what you want. Not all of the time.

But with the boys  it doesn't matter. Men can say just about anything to men and it is accepted. Better there is very little reaction. Men usually give it right back. One stupid thing deserves another stupid thing and so the banter degenerates into the puerile. In short we turn back into naughty little boys who like to talk shit. And women do this on their end as well  except the format is different. Women can be assured they wont offend each other while men try to at every turn.

And the great buddy movies show us this. They start with Butch Cassidy and the Sundance kid all the way up to Starsky and Hutch or any of the Bruce Willis vehicles where there is a duo trying to figure it out. Buddy movies are box office bank especially for men. But what is it beyond the idiocy? Surely there is friendship and loyalty and these count for a lot. Men are loyal and there is a code of respect. Men may like each other but respect is much higher. After that it is commiseration. And just hanging out. And having a beer.

You know. Friendship.

Rocket Man...the Catcher in the Rye for the Great Recession Generation

Books by William Hazelgrove